God fucking dammit, Tumblr

lies:

I thought the ads for theconjuringmovie were not going to be as bad as the ones for universalhorrorpictures, but I was wrong. I just hadn’t seen the worst ones yet.

This morning you put a super creepy animated gif in my dash of an actor’s troubled face, staring blankly, while behind him the gray, lifeless feet of a young woman, presumably a suicide victim who has hanged herself, dangle in the air.

It’s a really horrific image. I’m sure the people who made it are justifiably proud of the way it immediately took me out of the mental place I’d been, contemplating all the cool things that the beautiful, wonderful, interesting people I follow had put in my dash.

theconjuringmovie has not earned the right to have that particular kind of content appear inline with that of the people I follow. By giving your advertisers’ that power, and doing it repeatedly, despite my having previously told you it’s not okay, you’ve broken the terms and conditions that govern our relationship.

I’m not talking about a legal document that everyone clicks through and no one reads. I’m talking about the real terms and conditions. You and I had an agreement. You gave me access to a platform that lets me gather and appreciate the output of a lot of awesome people. I gave you my enthusiastic use of that platform, a piece of my time on earth, in which I tried, in my own inept, befuddled way, to contribute something back via my own curation.

I think what makes me so angry is that I believed you were capable of better. You were capable of better. God dammit, Tumblr. Why did you do this? I mean, I know why. I just thought you were better.

Followers, I’ve tried to think of what else I can do, and I really don’t see any alternative. I’m off Tumblr, at least for now. I’m going to take a week or so, pause my queue and think about it, but I’m not sure I’m coming back. Sorry for the dramatics.

P.S. If you’re a kid who’s willing to do anything for this URL, literally anything, ohmygod John pleeeeeeease, send me one more ask and tell me what you’d do with it. If I come back in a week feeling the same way I feel now, I’ll pick the most-worthy and let you have it.

Thanks.

1. There is a way to block all sponsored posts by blocking the $ symbol on them. But I don’t remember how to do that and it certainly won’t work forever.

2. I don’t understand their algorithm for handing out these ads. I’ve had neither of the horror movies (so far…) but I did have vh1’s Lets-Objectify-Women ad.

3. Mostly I’m frustrated because tumblr could have come up with really cool ways to do advertising* but instead they chose the absolute most boring and, incidentally, the one that is the least consumer friendly.

4. I understand if you choose to leave but I will miss you.

*For instance:

 - have us choose one “ad-blog” to follow per 100 regular blogs. (this would be a pretty great way to do it i think.)

 - have us select a classification rating (eg G, PG, M) and/or the ability to block certain topics (like tags!) like: suicide, nudity… etc??

 - have us select, from a list, several topics of ads.

Tags: tumblr